Thursday, December 27, 2012

A Christmas Story

This year I was reflecting on how Autism invades everything including Christmas, and how it's a process of acceptance as our expectations change.

First even shopping is a challenge, few toys even interest Gracie and if they do interest her it's never for long. Gracie doesn't really play with toys as much as she holds them and moves them around, placing the toy in containers and taking them out again. I finally decided on a mini trampoline as her big gift.

 

I ordered the trampoline online and on Christmas Eve after I gave Gracie two different sleep aids and put her down  Ray, Alaric and I started to assemble the thing. It's a miracle we didn't lose a hand or at the very least a finger. After much swearing, failed attempts and scratching our heads at the instructions we got it put together.

Then as I was putting things up Gracie woke up at 2 am, first with a low moan which quickly escalated to full screaming I tried to hold her as we rocked but the screaming lasted over an hour. As she screamed she woke up Elizabeth, who also wanted attention. For a while it seemed they were screaming in stereo. After the screaming stopped they both decided it was play time. Gracie sat in Elizabeth's rocking chair and jumped on her trampoline as I tried to clean up and get everything else set up. Gracie tried to tear down the stockings and I had to take the candy away from her many times. 

Elizabeth went back to bed about 3 but by 7 am I gave up on any sleep at all for the night and woke up the boys. As we were opening presents Gracie fell asleep on the couch.

Sleeping Beauty                
The funny thing is that this is a good Christmas to us. As Autism has taken over we have let go of all of our old expectations. I have come to realize we can never have a traditional Christmas, there must always be adjustments for Gracie. She may never "understand" Santa, Christ or rip open wrapping paper. New toys are still scary for her, Gracie doesn't look at camera so if she's still for a picture it gets posted, and I feel blessed if she even wears clothes. But we spent Christmas together as a family and she had a good time once she woke up which is as good as it gets for us. 










Friday, December 21, 2012

5 Reasons Why My Autistic Daughter is Like a Cat

My husband and I have often talked about how Gracie is like a cat. They say all cats have Aspergers but maybe all cats are just Autistic.

1. Gracie is very affectionate but only when SHE feels like it. Like a cat she will sit on your lap and make happy noises but only when it suits her, and only on her terms. Usually when it's inconvenient to me, while typing, trying to make dinner or attending to her sister. Of course I try to put down what I'm doing and love on my daughter. Our cuddle time lasts until Gracie has had enough then she hops down and continues with her day.

2. Gracie is extremely smart and is capable of doing much more than she's given credit for, but like a cat she doesn't respond to commands. A cat is as capable as a dog to fetch, sit, roll over, and to shake hands the difference is that a cat refuses to do so. I've caught Gracie matching letters, playing appropriately with shape sorting toys, and dressing her dolls. At evaluations she sits there staring blankly as she is scored as not having the skill.

3. Gracie only sometimes responds to her name but will always respond to food. Just like a cat will come running to the sound of a can opener, Gracie comes running to the rustle of a  box, she has an uncanny instinct about when I'm about to make a snack and is the first to want a bite.

4. Gracie is a crazy ball of energy. Do you know how a cat will be sitting perfectly still then out of no where run around the room in a terror, up and down furniture, leaping around then run back to their spot and sit down like nothing happened? That's Gracie out of no where she gets crazy, and sequels as she runs circles around us then stops as if it never happened. 

5. Gracie is driven by her own needs. A cat naps when she's tired, baths her own fur when taking a bath,and eats when hungry. Gracie is also driven to take care of herself without assistance. When Gracie is tired I find her on the couch asleep, when she is hungry she climbs counters, and pushes chairs to cupboards, when she's dirty she removes her clothes and sits in the bathtub waiting for me, when her pullup is wet she removes it and puts a fresh one on. Sometimes I wonder if I left Gracie home alone will the right supplies if she would be okay. Somehow I think she would find a way to take care of herself.